You've heard the saying, "be careful what you wish for", but perhaps a better phrasing of that thought would be that you should think long, hard, and carefully before you wish at all.
In just a few months, we'll be having our fifth child. Our lives are so incredibly busy during this season that it is hard for me not to look forward to a calmer season of life. I am pastoring a church, overseeing a Christian school, studying in a doctoral program, progressing in my Army Reserve career, managing two houses, and trying to be an excellent husband and father. On top of that, Alanna is finishing up her BSN degree, volunteering at the local pregnancy center, being a pastor's wife, being a full-time mother, and just recently handed the baton off after spending two years as a volunteer getting a preschool off the ground. However, this afternoon, Alanna and all the kids were in Myrtle Beach to meet with Stephanie. I was alone in my office working on both school and church work. I was thinking how nice the sound of silence was, and how enjoyable it was to be able to get work done without the constant threat of interruption. However, at one point, I stood up and turned around to look out the window. I looked to my right at my desk and books, and then to my left at various awards and metals that I had earned in the Army. Suddenly, I was acutely aware of the fact that I was completely alone. This strange sensation of utter loneliness momentarily overwhelmed me to the point where it almost made my heart hurt. I was instantly very grateful for my wife and kids. Please remember this in those times when you're wishing the present away and hoping for the future. While it's always good to be goal oriented, and to be presently pressing on toward future goals, don't neglect the gifts of the present. One day, you may well be surrounded by your own accolades and the sound of silence and have no one to enjoy them with, and the present you once wished away will be the past that you long for.
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June 2022
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